THE FIRST NIGHT OUT

I resisted tonight – all down the line but I did go in the end and it was good. I did the meeting first to attend to the disease of addiction. Then went with Anastasia up to No 5. We ate well and talked with friends and listened to music. I am not very afraid when I am out now – not quite so afraid that I will collapse and be unable to get out of a situation.

I missed him tonight. We had so many good times and I wished he were singing but the memory had a mellowness to it. Not so bad.

Julie played TIMELESS for Izzy and spoke some words of tribute.  I felt a load lift off me and almost closed my eyes and wept right there in the Cafe. Oh Iz. Oh, my.

That was the next hurdle for me and I am unsure of what it was but I think it was significant. I enjoyed myself despite the many whispers of all the Gigs Izzy and I did together. I am lonely for that world.

ONE MORE RIVER CROSSED. ONE MORE RIVER CROSSED.

croft-and-dolben

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