Today is a day like any other: twenty-four hours, alittle sunshine, a little rain.Listen, says ambition, nervously shifting her weight fromone boot to another — why don’t you get going?For there I am, in the mossy shadows, under the trees.And to tell the truth I don’t want to let go of the wristsof idleness, I don’t want to sell my life for money,I don’t even want to come in out of the rain.– Mary Oliver
I actually got up today. I knew I was going to a meeting. So I got up and the ducks were on the loose. Then Kaybee and Clarz took me to Urunga and I got a meeting in. I am still teary and flat but somewhat better. I have Arkue and Ana is mobile and doing meetings so there is the possibility of a lift to other meetings.
In the meantime – these few days suck. I am unhappy and lonely and still lost. I do not feel at home and I like feeling AT HOME. BUT it is just the meantime. THIS TOO WILL PASS.
“Don’t duck the most difficult problems. That just ensures that the hardest part will be left when you are most tired. Get the big one done – it’s downhill from then on.”― Norman Vincent Peale
Common Long Term ProblemsPost Sepsis Syndrome (PSS) is the term used to describe the group of long term problems that some patients who have experienced severe sepsis can suffer during their rehabilitation period.The effect of any critical illness and spending time being treated in a Critical Care Unit is already recognised by health care professionals as causing certain long term problems for up to two years afterwards. However, sepsis can cause additional problems which may not become apparent for several weeks, for example, recurring infections during the rehabilitation period.THE LENGTH OF TIME SPENT IN HOSPITAL CAN ALSO AFFECT REHABILITATION.
I HAVE NOT FOUND MYSELF TODAY.
I am wearied and sad in an aimless off-handed way.
I suppose it is one of those ‘IN BETWEEN’ times. It reminds me of Tugun in 2002.
Bring me sunrises and views and birds on my verandah.
Bring me beauty and grace and dignity
Remove me from drunks and drug users.
Bring me to MY place.
Bring me to meetings and water and companions and a passing parade.
Bring me to the Children.
Bring me home.
And I shall finish with another Sepsis story. So many of us have suffered this way and are suffering.
This is Part One of my Sepsis Survival Story.
Hello, thanks very much for letting me join this group.
My name is Brian, & I will tell you my story in 2 parts.
I went into Hospital for removal of a gallstone in cystic duct & to have a plastic stent fitted, on Jan 6th 2017. There was a small perforation in my duct by mistake during surgery. This developed into Biliary Sepsis. I didn’t know what this meant at the time. At 39.1 degrees I didn’t know what was really being said to me, I was delirious. Having Severe Sepsis Infection, I was administered intravenously, directly into my veins, Antibiotics, Morphine, paracetamol, fluids & nutritional liquids. If there was anything else like anti-sickness I was not aware. I was told I had raised inflammatory markers, although I could not process a question to ask what it meant as I was drifting to sleep.
Whilst at my worst, I knew I was very ill. I remember getting ready to die. I realised I was not afraid of dying, I was scared of what I would leave behind. Very emotive, but true. I knew I had to be strong to survive and be positive, as I didn’t want to leave my wonderful Wife, family and rabbits behind, and this wonderful life we have, has to continue.
It wasn’t until I left the Hospital, that my Wife Nicky & I started research into Biliary Sepsis & Sepsis. We are shocked & cannot believe we were not offered any information, no aftercare offered, and not told to look for signs of re-occurrence, as this is a known Sepsis habit.
I was sent home with Oral Antibiotics. 5 days after the antibiotics were finished I started feeling ill again.
On the 20th January 2017 I went to Doctors. The Doctor I saw didn’t take any notice in what I was saying, and completely ignored the fact I had surgery 14 days ago. He didn’t want to know about the Biliary Sepsis I had just experienced. Instead he pressed as hard as he could, causing me to grab the inspection bed with both hands & arch my back rigid off the bed, the pain was stupidly intense. When I told him to stop pressing hard & to stop holding his hand down, on the surgical site, as he was hurting me, he just turned away, walked off and said he had finished the examination, I had to go as he was running an hour late and next patient was due. I didn’t even have my full appointment time.
I tried to get up but the waves of pain were too much, I collapsed back on the inspection bed. Dr Potts took no notice & didn’t help me. I used every ounce of strength to sit up on the inspection bed, I managed on the second attempt to sit on the edge, then I was sweating & swaying, feeling light headed. He saw this from his chair but didn’t help, he didn’t care, and he said I had leave. I told him I felt ill and about the worry & anxiety of the early warning signs of re-occurring Sepsis, and the symptoms I was having. He retorted examination was over. I left the room in considerable pain, everything I told the Doctor fell on deaf ears, I found him dismissive, ignorant and uncaring. My Wife was with me & witnessed it all.
The following day my temperature range was 36.8 to 38 degrees. My temp rising around 38 I was having an occasional shiver & a nasty thumping headache over my right eye. I felt stiff, my left shoulder very stiff, and my pain still very high in surgical area from previous day. We both knew these were early warning signs to keep a watchful eye on.
The next day temperature was spiking at 38 degrees & up and down again. I was losing appetite, picking at food, I was feeling extra tired, slightly nauseous in the morning, and I still had the thumping headache over my right eye. My temperature range was 36 to 38. I was drinking lots of fluids, about 4 litres of water, dosed up, but couldn’t shift the headache, which was starting to feel like a migraine.
Sorry for length of this story, it does need to be told. Part 2 will be in the next few days. It will start with a similar heading and will be dated Monday 23rd Jan 2017. Many thanks and good luck to all readers.
Bri Maze King ©
Another day has passed and one too flash. Pain in my side has become worse and I got Kaybee to get my script out of the chemist. That helped but has meant another day in bed and no meetings. I did have a long conversation on phone with Arkue and I have good food from town via Kaybee.
I also had an hour or so with my girls and now Facetime.That is it for today.
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